I am always amazed how the Lord guides and directs our lives as we open the door and allow Him to enter. From the time I was a little child I have been taught that we can rely upon the Lord to provide us with direction and instruction through this journey of life. Throughout this summer especially I have seen so much what can happen when I allow my Lord and Savior into my life completely. I began the summer apprehensive not knowing how it would turn out I had just graduated from BYU and had absolutely no idea what was next. The only step I knew was that I would be working with the Especially For Youth program in southern Utah and Arizona. Even with my previous experience I knew this year would be different. I had taken upon myself different responsibilities and had the opportunity to move outside of the Provo region. Each step of the way I interacted with new people and learned so many things about the gospel, myself and what I really want and need to do in this life.
With each turn of the road I saw little by little how the Lord had directed the movements of my life and choreographed the events to put me in the right place and teach me just what I needed to learn. Whether it be through conversations with others, stresses or struggles I experienced, or joyful moments I have been mentored and taught wonderous things. Through all this, I felt great worry and concern for what I would be doing at the end of the summer. Would I get a job offer for a teaching position? Was I to remain in Utah or move home to Ohio? Was I to serve a mission for the Church or was there some other calling that the Lord had in store for me? So much was my mind caught up in this unknown that I was constantly stressed about it; trying my best to do all that I could to be worthy of the Lord's direction but feeling that I was getting none. Each time that I would pray about what I was to do I would receive a calming feeling and the assurance that I need not stress. But how was I not to stress, I felt that I was running out of time to make plans. What I needed to learn this whole time was that it was the Lord's plan that was to followed, not mine. I was asking to be directed how I should proceed forward in life before I stepped forward; but this is not what the Lord requires of us.
During my experience at the Hill Cumorah Pageant I received the instruction that I was to make a plan the best that I new how and then turn it over to the Lord. Not meaning that I made a plan and then idly waited, but rather that I set a plan the best that I knew how and then did everything I could to carry it out. In doing this I knew that as I remained faithful to Him and sought to keep His commandments He would direct my steps as I moved down one path or another. Recently there was an article published in the Ensign about firefighters who learned this same lesson (July 2011 Ensign, Start Moving). As we wait upon the Lord to provide us with direction we must be actively moving down one path or another in order to be directed by Him. Thus, the path that I determined I would travel down was actively preparing for a mission. I have been pondering the idea of going for a long time but at this moment I felt that I needed to act more definitively about it and make great steps to go. So, the next week I talked to my Mom about whether I should meet with my Bishop in Utah about it and get papers moving or whether I should wait until the end of the summer when I moved home. Her counsel was to have my records moved to their family ward and then start the papers as soon as possible from there; and this I did. In the process as usual things were delayed and it did not progress as quickly as I had imagined; but my resolve was set and my mind made up that I would go.
In the subsequent weeks as I truly sought to turn my life over to the Savior and purely do His will I saw opportunity after opportunity open up which allowed me to not only serve others but to myself be prepared for what was to come. I still do not know how everything will turn out. But because I have experimented on His word and trusted in Him being faithful to every commandment that He has given, I am confident that things will work out in the perfection of our Savior. In all of this I know life will not be easy and the path will not always be clear, but I know that I must trust in him, acknowledge him in all things and allow him to direct me (Proverbs 3:5). This is the only way I can truly become all that my Father in Heaven would have me be and I am prepared to do ALL that is required to stand before Him at the last day and hear him say well done and envelope me in his arms of love (D&C 6:20).
